# 远程办公竟成职场原罪？新加坡打工人亲述：在家工作两天，却被同事冷落、领导怀疑

URL: https://www.shicheng.news/v/oYPy2
Published: 2026-04-22
Source: 狮城新闻

![远程办公竟成职场原罪？新加坡打工人亲述：在家工作两天，却被同事冷落、领导怀疑](https://www.shicheng.news/images/image/1784/17842928.avif?0)





新加坡：30多岁的父亲R每天最担心的事，不是加班到深夜，而是——他成了部门里唯一一个每周在家办公两天的人。

当初，当他向部门主管申请灵活办公时，对方爽快批准，只为让他能照顾两岁的孩子。可当公司于2025年底将‘回办公室上班’重新定为默认政策后，他的‘在家办公’竟成了同事眼中的异类行为。

“他们不说破，但会用沉默惩罚你，”R说，“我发Teams消息没人回，邮件发了三天没回复，偏偏等我回办公室，才凑过来当面聊——仿佛远程工作是种偷懒的特权。”

尽管他工作响应率100%，绩效稳居团队前茅，他仍担心某天主管会说：“你要继续远程办公？那这份工作可能不再适合你了。”

这不是个例。

新加坡推行灵活办公已超一年。根据人力部（MOM）数据，七成企业已提供灵活工作安排，近九成申请获得批准。但员工们却发现：**灵活性，正在悄悄成为一种代价。**

**“隐形霸凌”：当同事用沉默表达不满**

R的妻子在医疗行业，无法远程办公；母亲兼职帮忙带娃。他每周两天在家办公，只为多睡一小时、边工作边盯住孩子，结果效率反而飙升。可办公室政治却让他如履薄冰。

另一位在博物馆工作的Jolie，因照顾病重父母获得灵活工时。主管起初信任她，但高层却担心：“如果谁想在家就回家，那办公室还有意义吗？”

父母去世后，这位上司甚至每天发消息查岗：“你真在工作吗？别把灵活当福利。”

**“父亲的原罪”：为什么男人申请远程办公更难？**

新加坡国立大学与伦敦国王学院2022年研究发现：**男性申请远程办公，反而更容易被贴上“不够投入”的标签。**

因为传统观念中，男性本就是“理想员工”——全天候在线、随时待命。当他们提出灵活安排，就打破了“男人就该在工位上拼命”的刻板印象。

“他们不是不努力，”研究者Dr. Wang指出，“而是他们的‘努力’，被默认定义为‘坐在办公室’。”

**“不是福利，是刚需”：癌症康复者、新手妈妈的无声挣扎**

一位癌症康复员工坦言：“同事以为我好了，可我每天要吃药、做复健、应对脑雾和疲劳。他们不理解，为什么我不能准时开会。”

而像Arveen Kaur这样的职场妈妈，虽被公司主动提供“兼职全职”岗位，仍不敢公开提及孩子需求——怕被当成“靠照顾家庭才获得优待”。

**“你不是在偷懒，你是在拯救生产力”**

人力部数据显示，65.4%的员工将“灵活办公”列为择业关键因素，仅次于薪资。15%的“高就低聘”者，更是因为“时间自由”才接受岗位。

但问题在于：**政策只要求“考虑”请求，不强制“批准”**。

“这导致经理们把灵活办公当成‘施舍’，”南洋理工大学Trevor Yu教授说，“他们以为‘在办公室’=‘有责任心’，却忘了：**真正的敬业，是交付成果，不是打卡签到。**”

**未来已来：从“打卡思维”到“成果思维”**

专家呼吁：企业必须停止用“是否在工位”衡量价值，转而建立以**绩效、交付、结果**为核心的评估体系。

“灵活办公不是奖励，是新常态。”

R说：“我们有育儿津贴、生育奖励，但若连‘在家带娃’都算职场风险，那新加坡的生育率，永远只能靠补贴硬撑。”

“当一个父亲因为想照顾孩子，就要被怀疑是否‘配得上’这份工作——那我们真正失去的，不只是他的生产力，更是下一代的希望。”

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![远程办公竟成职场原罪？新加坡打工人亲述：在家工作两天，却被同事冷落、领导怀疑](https://www.shicheng.news/images/image/1784/17842934.avif?0)





Working mum Arveen Kaur on her first day of work in 2024 (left) and with her daughter in 2025 (right). (Photos: Arveen Kaur)

## CLASHES OVER FLEXIBILITY



In some cases, disagreements over flexibility have put workers’ livelihoods in danger and led to acrimony between employer and employee.

MW, 40, works in a real estate consultancy and is a father of two. His 10-year-old son has complex special needs, difficulties with mobility and feeding, and is non-verbal.

In early 2024, the family went through a crisis period when MW’s son was hospitalised and their maid, the boy’s main caregiver, was diagnosed with an end-stage illness.

With his son fully reliant on him, MW had to ask his then-employer to let him work from the hospital so he could look after the boy.

The employer was unhappy as this went on for two months, and warned MW he could be terminated if this continued.

He managed to change jobs before that, and now works for a company that gives him more flexibility to work from home. His son is out of the hospital and doing better.

But MW said he is not open with his new employer about his son’s health conditions, and would hesitate to apply for flexible work arrangements even if he needed them.

“If my work is really strictly asking me to come to the office …. I might be reluctant to apply (for flexible work arrangements),” he said.

“My former experience was pretty traumatising. I almost lost my job and I was the sole breadwinner. So if I lose my job, it’s really not easy.”

CNA also spoke to a working mother who made a report with the Tripartite Alliance for Fair and Progressive Employment Practices (TAFEP) about issues including flexible work.

She wanted flexibility in her work location and timing to fulfil her maternity-related and infant caregiving responsibilities.

Her request was turned down by her employer citing the operational requirements of her role, said the woman, who is a senior leader in her firm.

The disagreement with her employer has not been resolved.

Such disputes are why TAFEP provides a channel to investigate complaints.

If companies do not comply with having a process to evaluate flexible work requests, the agency can advise and educate employers on how to follow the guidelines.

As for cases where employers are recalcitrant or wilfully refuse to comply with the guidelines, MOM may issue a warning and require them to attend corrective workshops, the ministry said previously.

So far, TAFEP has received one complaint on flexible work arrangements since the guidelines took effect on Dec 1, 2024.

“The complaint involved a company that communicated the outcome of the flexible work arrangement request verbally and not in writing,” said a TAFEP spokesperson.

“TAFEP has since worked with the company to revise its processes to be in line with the tripartite guidelines.”

## THE FLEXIBILITY STIGMA



To look into how formal remote work arrangements translate to real-world outcomes, researchers Wang Senhu from the National University of Singapore (NUS) and Chung Heejung from King’s College London investigated how managers in Singapore perceive employees who work remotely.

In their 2022 survey – which was before the guidelines were formalised – 473 managers were asked to evaluate hypothetical workers with different profiles, including some remote workers.

The workers were rated on their commitment, productivity, team spirit and promotion opportunities.

The managers gave remote workers significantly lower ratings than full-time office workers, according to the findings published this February in the journal Gender, Work & Organization.

The researchers said this confirms theories of a “flexibility stigma” – the bias that workers who use flexible work arrangements are less productive, motivated or committed.

They noted extensive evidence elsewhere that flexible workers are generally as (if not more) productive, more loyal, more committed to their jobs and happier with their working conditions, leading to fewer problems with sickness, absenteeism and retention.

The Singapore-based study made two other notable findings.

First, the stigma was more pronounced for fathers and childless people than for mothers.

This is because the managers rated fathers who work full-time in the office the most highly to begin with, and held negative views towards mothers regardless of where they did their work.

“The ‘larger drop’ for fathers is partly because they are traditionally held to the ‘ideal worker’ norm – the expectation of total availability,” Dr Wang, an assistant professor of sociology and anthropology, told CNA.

“When fathers request flexibility, they violate this gendered expectation more sharply than mothers do.”

Second, the stigma is stronger when the national context frames remote work as a policy targeted at mothers or parents, and not as a policy for all workers.

Dr Wang said the framing of a remote work policy is often more consequential to how it is perceived than its actual coverage.

“Even if a policy is technically universal, framing it around ‘mothers and parents’ signals to managers and colleagues that remote work is a ‘special favour’ or a deviation from professional commitment for caregiving reasons,” he said.

“This reinforces the stigma that remote workers are less devoted to their careers, regardless of who is actually eligible to apply.”

## IS IT A NEED OR A WANT?



Despite worries of stigma and the possibility of job loss, there is still strong demand for flexible work arrangements.

In a 2024 MOM survey, 65.4 per cent of workers said the availability of flexible work arrangements was an important factor in choosing whether to take up a particular job. This was second only to remuneration, chosen by 80.3 per cent.

Flexibility mattered to more people than leave benefits, job stability, professional development opportunities, promising career prospects, meaningful work experience and other options in that survey.

And according to recent MOM data on workers who voluntarily took jobs for which they are “overqualified”, about 15 per cent cited the suitable work hours and about 14 per cent cited the flexible work schedule as reasons.

IHRP’s Mr Sardar said the question of whether an employee’s request for flexibility is a “need” or a “want” is best addressed through open dialogue and clarity about the impact of the arrangement.

“In many cases, what initially appears to be a ‘want’ may, when better understood, relate to employee well-being, retention, or sustained performance,” he said.

“The intent is not to default to a binary outcome, but to explore practical solutions where possible.”

## How employers should assess flexible work requests 



IHRP encourages organisations to adopt a tiered approach when assessing requests.

“Approve where the role supports flexibility, there is no material business disruption, and any performance risks are manageable,” said Mr Sardar.

“Modify where partial flexibility is feasible, or where identified risks can be mitigated through adjustments.

“Reject where there is clear, evidence-based business harm, and no reasonable alternative arrangement exists.”

Reasonable business grounds for rejection should be based on demonstrable impact on productivity, service delivery, cost or team effectiveness, he added. This ensures decisions are objective and defensible.

“At the core, it is about balancing business needs with managing employee expectations, recognising that flexible work arrangements are not universally applicable across all roles,” said Mr Sardar.

Collapse Expand One example is the invisible needs that arise among cancer survivors reintegrating into the workforce.

Cancer patients and survivors may need flexible work arrangements to manage their recovery, medical appointments and energy levels, said Mr Mark Lin, head of psychosocial services overseeing the return-to-work programme at the Singapore Cancer Society.

“A colleague may look well but be privately managing side effects like brain fog, fatigue, or still have to go for follow-up treatments,” he said.

“When colleagues don’t understand this and expect the survivor to be back to normal, this can create a gap between expectations and realities.”

More broadly, he said the ability to manage workforce health variability – and the flexibility that requires – is becoming a core organisational capability, not merely a “nice-to-have”.

“As Singapore faces an ageing population with rising rates of chronic diseases – including cancer – organisations will need to manage employees with fluctuating capacity, invisible symptoms, and changing stamina,” he said.

“Those that manage health variability well will enjoy better productivity, reduced attrition and increased psychological safety among their workforces.”

## NORMS ARE CHANGING



Replying to CNA’s queries, the TAFEP spokesperson said the tripartite guidelines shape norms and expectations around flexible work requests.

To this end, some workers told CNA that the changed rules have already helped to improve acceptance.

Ms Sher-Li Torrey, a longtime advocate for working mothers, has noticed that employers seem more open to conferring flexibility to existing employees and roles after the guidelines came into effect.

Flexible work arrangements are better understood by HR officers, and it is “less of a boo-boo” to ask for them. She knows of more returning mothers making such requests upfront in their job interviews.

The founder of social enterprise Mums@Work, which supports working mothers and employers implementing flexible work, also still hears of lingering issues.

“Increasingly I hear that the boss is very supportive, but the teammates can feel it’s unfair privilege or even an ‘added bonus’ simply because you are a caregiver,” said Ms Torrey.

One example she cited was of colleagues scheduling meetings at unfriendly timings. One mother’s teammates held regular huddles just before or at the time when her official work hours ended and she had to pick up her kids.

Some returning mothers also feel they may have been “passed over” for serious projects that carry more weight or offer more chances to shine.

They see this as part of the “deal” in exchange for flexibility, said Ms Torrey.

Workers differ on whether the guidelines have changed workplace norms for better or for worse.

One employee in a corporate role within the manufacturing sector told CNA that the guidelines were used to justify more scrutiny and rigidity around flexible work arrangements in her company.

![远程办公竟成职场原罪？新加坡打工人亲述：在家工作两天，却被同事冷落、领导怀疑](https://www.shicheng.news/images/image/1784/17842935.avif?0)





Vera Lau, Saxo's head of marketing in Singapore, in the office. She asked for and received flexible work arrangements as a new mother. (Photo: Vera Lau)

But there are also some like Ms Vera Lau, 28 and head of marketing at investment firm Saxo, who had no lack of support for flexibility in the workplace.

Ms Lau, who had a baby last January, works from home twice a week, keeping the same hours as her colleagues in the office.

Before this, the default was one day of remote work subject to approval by a manager, which Ms Lau said she rarely used.

She credits an understanding environment and strong company culture for how well her flexible work arrangement has worked out.

“My team and colleagues were accommodating, where possible, even scheduling our important meetings to the days I’m in the office,” she said.

An evaluation took place three months in to ensure her performance was not slipping, and there have been no concerns since. Her hybrid arrangement is now reviewed every six months.

“I’d say individuals feel more empowered and know that this option exists if needed,” Ms Lau said of the impact the guidelines have had on her company’s flexible work norms.

Mr Zhang, who asked to use his surname only and who works in the professional services industry, felt that the guidelines helped to sustain remote work arrangements from the pandemic.

The 36-year-old father of young children has made informal, ad hoc requests to work from home on certain days, which his employer granted easily.

A formal request to work from home regularly is more elusive. “Because my role deals with internal stakeholders … (the) employer has hinted at the importance of my physical presence,” he said.

Still, he felt the company culture was understanding of family needs and that flexible work requests were fairly considered.

## PERSONAL PLANS



Despite some accounts of workplace cultures changing for the better, experts told CNA that there is room to improve how flexible work arrangements are perceived in the workplace.

For one, NUS’ Dr Wang noted that the introduction of the tripartite guidelines has been contextualised with discussion about more people becoming caregivers in an ageing society, which has given the guidelines “social legitimacy” by addressing an urgent demographic need.

But this also suggests such arrangements are a tool for fulfilling personal responsibilities, rather than a standard mode of high-performance work, he said.

This may in turn inadvertently strengthen the flexibility stigma in the corporate world, he added.

From the worker’s perspective, the existence of the stigma can discourage people from taking on such arrangements, which can impact family planning.

For instance, R, the hybrid worker with a toddler, said he and his wife only felt they could manage having a baby because remote work became the norm during COVID-19.

Likewise, they are now held back from having another child by the uncertainty over whether remote work will continue to be tolerated at his workplace.

“We can have money, we can have a lot of baby bonuses and all that, but if this kind of very crucial issues are not dealt with, it’s close to impossible to increase the birth rate, because these are very real day-to-day issues,” said R.

## “AN OUTDATED SIGNAL”



Dr Wang was also asked if the existence of the stigma is related to the fact that Singapore’s guidelines require employers to consider flexible work requests, but not necessarily to grant such requests once they are made.

He said the requirement to consider requests – but not approve them – may create significant variation in managers’ perceptions, and that it places the burden of justification on employees.

“Managers who already hold traditional views may perceive those who request flexible work arrangements as less committed, potentially intensifying the stigma for those who ‘push’ for their rights under the guidelines,” he said.

MOM has previously said that the guidelines acknowledge employers’ prerogative to decide on work arrangements.

In a snap poll of about 140 employers by the Singapore National Employers Federation in late 2025, 13 per cent had no plans to start offering remote work.

The top reasons they gave were difficulty maintaining consistent communication, the nature of business operations, a lack of interaction among employees, and difficulty ensuring equity or fairness across all roles.

Rather than tightening the guidelines, experts agreed that implementation and developing managers’ capabilities should now be the priority.

To lead flexible teams, managers need to know how to set clear expectations, manage workers through outcomes and handle flexible work requests consistently and fairly, said IHRP's Mr Sardar.

Associate Professor Trevor Yu of the Nanyang Business School said: “Much of the stigma persists because of an outdated signal: being seen in the office is equated with commitment, while flexibility is read as lower ambition or reliability.”

He said the next step is to shift organisational leadership and managers from a “permission mindset” to a “performance and job design mindset”.

This means managing talent through deliverables and service standards, and not physical visibility.

To do this, he said employers must make decisions on flexible work transparent and clearly tie them to job requirements, ensure flexible workers are evaluated fairly without “hidden penalties”, and hold line managers accountable for their decisions.

“The guidelines are a strong initiator for reform. They standardise process, but the real challenge now is cultural,” said Assoc Prof Yu.

“If Singapore wants genuine acceptance of flexible work arrangements, the focus has to shift to how work is evaluated, how managers are trained, and how organisations ensure that flexibility does not become a quiet career penalty.”